I'm a crazy person
Although my father had to work early in the morning, she never complained and got angry. My father was a diligent employee. Pedaling my dad all day with sweat pouring down his parents and panting. Sunset before he came home with a sense of fatigue. However, each received a weekly salary he never forgot to bring a souvenir for me. Sometimes a
pack of two butirpermen or salted nuts. it's neat for me cukupmenggembirakan, children of poor families in Tegal, Central Java.
My mother was also very diligent. Only do not take care of household well, but also small-scale trading to supplement their income. So, if our lives were always short, the least they can not be blamed. Maybe we were meant for the poor and miserable fate should be.
All of a sudden, for whatever reason, one day my father came home from work other than normal, temperament changed. He often smiled to myself and did not want to work. I'm no longer invited kidding. To me he was always laughing, but his eyes did not look at me and not say anything. And mother never told me, "If you're a big up, be like your father. He was a man of honest and brave. Now, how pathetic.
Temperament my father more confusing. He likes to shout, far different from his past that is gentle and loving. Temah schoolmates say, my father had changed the memory, aka not sane. Oh God, really it? Really I'm a crazy person? "Do not you care about what they say," Mother said, every time I tell my friends scoffed that sambilmenangis. "After all he is your father. And you must remain proud to be his son."
I really admire my mother. He, who is now toiling all day to no time to rest, my father faithfully serve the growing la-ma more violent, so I'm afraid to approach, so it happened that it meremangkan chilling when one night she slept in the back room, while the front room is occupied my grandmother's old. As usual, history sick mind, my father slept in the halls room. Suddenly I woke mother who was asleep at his side, and with bated breath she sent me out as soon as possible. I was surprised and confused.
Why? I wondered. Are you also have ...? Oh, no. Apparently he kissed a bad feeling because my father was yelling furiously, blocking the back door. I even dragged my mother to. the front door. But it was too late. My father jumped up and grabbed kebaya mother, then dipped kiknya hard. Mom can not make a sound. I'm the one who was screaming for help. My grandmother woke up. He tried to release her. But what the old woman's weak. My grandmother encouraged my father to fall into tiles and cracked his head against the door.
Fortunately, the neighbors arrive. They prevent gang, but did not succeed. My father is like a man possessed. Whether the power of which caused my father to have that much power. Then my dad fury subsided after two men arrived and persuaded my uncle to release Mother's father from the clutches his hands.
Irrespective of the mother as though pole gantunsan. He fell back with his face still scared. While my father even started smiling back as he curses sell elusive. So since then my father so famous, people discussed everywhere because of the dangerous madness. Especially after he was homeless, without purpose, laughing and cursing the whole way. Everyone knew his name, and I got carried away carried the title "son of a madman", a title which makes diiiku shunned and cut off my school friends. Nothing else kec4ali familiar with my mother.
Mother only oranq kampunq uneducated. But my mom is a great educator who was credited. He always asked me politely for more than complain to God to fellow human beings. On certain nights he woke me to run tahajud prayers.
"Whatever happens, do not be angry with God because we do not know what the hidden wisdom behind his semuakehendak," said Helen as she gently stroked my hair. > However, I can not silence my homeroom teacher in advance. Teacher to tell my family atmosphere. And he responded to my complaints with the wise. Perhaps because I am intelligent and diligent, though a lunatic child; Towards complete primary school I asked him, "Teacher is a lunatic child may become a student ...! Course, of course, because human utnat same degree. The important thing is you should be diligent and patient. Insha Allah, the Lord would give way, "answered the teacher's heart good.
At this terbangkit more enthusiasm to attend school up to college. It was not thought of who would pay, and I still have a sister, and my mom just improvise for a living, which is sometimes not enough for everyday purposes. Especially after the announcement of the results EBTANAS, my number posted as the holder of the top ranking among all elementary schools in my town. I'm happy, but just enjoy myself because in the event of separation, I did not dare come out with friends the other to celebrate the festive feast.
I must know myself because my family are poor and destitute. I looked at the festive event of the garden behind the rotting windows and campang threadbare. I swear, will fight poverty by working whatever sekalah before continuing. So that day I walked around the TG to find a job. In a company building kantraktar I reprimanded aleh wrong searang mandarnya, "Huh. Small-small this is going to look for work. Why not just go to school?" I: biting his lip, In my heart I rebelled, "Who does not like to study? I want smart. Because That I want to work, in order to collect school fees later."
Mandar is still faced sangar. However, he was generous. I received working as a mason assistant in building a supermarket taka. Earn USD 1250 per day. Hatlku terhlbur although at that time my mother was three months work dlbawa uwakku to Jakarta. Sebagal reportedly waiter at his restaurant. Taka I built was standing with magnificent. As a mason assistant, I was proud to see the building supermarkets that sell a variety of stuff. However, sometimes I'm sad, too.
In the building come dripping sweat, and I felt a considerable contribution to the time the sun dl I worked as fast during the month of Ramadan. However, after the shit I can not come away with me to enjoy it because separated by differences in the way of life and identity are too far away. When I stood in front of him, as I stared at a tall mountain to climb impossible. Even so, I'm very happy because I have been able to prove to the world that I can be a real man. All that I told my mother after she returned from Jakarta a month later. My mother, too proud. That is why perhaps he allowed me to move to Jakarta, menggantlkan his job as a waitress at the diner uwakku belongs.
Mashaallah. Jakarta is really very amazing. That's the first impression I got off ketlka in Pulo Gadung bus station, after a slow journey and boring for nine hours. Endless clicked my mouth in astonishment, how in the world of dreams berhayal. Building skyscrapers vying with each other up, as if the earth no longer a foothold. And in fact it is. I just realized, Jakarta was too stuffy and crowded to breathe. Especially in the slum area in East Jakarta, where rice kiosks uwakku pavement .<><> But never mind, I was NOT care. Arrival in Jakarta not to have fun, but to extract energy and continue the school. That is my resolve. If NO because the intention was, which I have the heart to leave my mother at home with my sister who was a child?
It seems to be the servant NOT as easy as I imagined. I often make mistakes in serving customers. If it were so, then I know how to temper the village after becoming a big city dwellers. Uwakku often snapped with a rough sentence: "Fool you. No incompetent customer service." Oh, God. Is this uwakku himself, who in the famous village gentle and benevolent? No wonder she did not want to come to Jakarta again, and with the tears off my absence. It turned out that Jakarta was not seraman lights glittering. Luckily I have a place to complain the most serene, namely in the third prayer tahajud night.
The next day I was able to wake up refreshed. However, there is a sight that always bothered my composure, which is when kids in blue uniforms and white junior high school rushing toward each school in the morning, and, happily return to their homes dlsiang day. I was jealous and wanted to like them. Finally I could not resist the turmoil I feel. Frankly uwakku I tell if I knew he would be angry and think I do not know the uhtung. "What? School?" she said aloud. I was pounding. "Yes, Wak. I want to school," I said with a shudder ...
Uwakku looked sharp! and then said firmly, "In Jakarta, we have to work hard. Who was lazy, must be eliminated. That is why I often angry-angry with you, so you do not mushy." Yes Wak, "was all out of my mouth. However, the following words uwakku me terlongong-longong not believe." My ketekunanmu test. Because of that, I do not mind. Continue school, God willing, I will help the limited abilities. "Yes, Lord. It seems my suspicions to him that suspicion is unfounded. Uwakku villagers remained resilient and kind. I became ashamed of himself, and his promise not to waste dilimpahkannya belief that by working harder and studying diligently.
My reward as a waitress I've saved and saved. Others kukrimkan to the village to ease the burden on Mother who still bear the cost of my sister's school. Lebihrapi and maintained so that, I leave to Kang celenganku Dir, uwakku boy, who was like my brother already own. Without his consent I can not spend a dime. How bahagiaku moment because I was finally able to resume classes in junior high meskipunterpaksa private. Dir Kang's suggestion, I stopped by the shop uwakku, and is now trading asongan cigarettes. To increase income, I also delivered newspapers and magazines to some customers.
Fatigue that I lead a year. Learning while selling cigarettes to markets, to the terminals, even in the intersection-intersection. Often I saw my friend with a car delivered. The driver was buying cigarettes from me without knowing that the seller is a friend of his master's son. However, I still follow the teachings maslh mother, every night praying tahajud kecuall if asleep until morning.
Arrive times I've been waiting. Grade report card introduce division. Kang Dir act sebagal guardian, get that report card. Alhamdullllah. I went straight to do prostrations of gratitude that I saw my number unity dl ranked among junior high students lalnnya. Concerns and paid for pa-yahku efforts so far. Toward enter the third year, I was impressed by Mr Ustaz in speech welcoming New Year event in 1407 that Hljriyah moved from hljrah berartl life dilapidated old to new life full of hope. I was determined to migrate from the all-state left to a better atmosphere.
For that I want to trade a bigger, I happen to have the acquaintance of young men in Aceh who sells bath-tub, pan, and a variety of plastic goods. I expressed my interest to mengiukuti trail, he accepted with Ikhlas. I was given the opportunity to share investment. I agree after Kang Dir also supports that plan. I took out my savings, and I started to become small entrepreneurs. Apparently I'm spoiled by fate. Daganganku forward, the benefits fairly. I've been able to hire their own homes because the inherent purpose of bringing about my mother and sister to live together in Jakarta. I chose a place in Rawamangun as a strategic area to sell. Who's to know my mother also could trade anything.
Really lucky luck. My mother did not mind accompanying me to Jakarta. Similarly, my brother. Just a block up my mind was the fate of my father. He still continued to quiver with the lack of an increasingly become warasannya-so. However, what to say? lasudah not recognize her family anymore, he engrossed himself along with .<><> But, whether because it was suddenly sunny sky turned gray? As a result of the devaluation of the rupiah, daganganku not sell. That business had to stop them. Un-tung Kang Dir provide a way out. He had a cigarette and unemployed cart. He made me use it to sell. The advantage is not as big as before, but enough to finance the needs of the three of us, complete with school fees and my sister until I graduated from junior high school and my sister the next grade.
Actually I'm a little sad to see my brother's grades are too low. However, it was not as heavy sadness of my soul burden faced Dir Kang attitude, he was not as friendly as before. His face was dull. And I'm ketlka cost money to sign up for high school, he threw thunder in telinsaku. "Ali. The cart will sell cigarettes to pay the debt." It's just words. Brief, but painful.
So, what to do to connect hldup next? I begged his wisdom. However, he could not dlantarkan. The cart was forced to return the cigarettes. At the moment the two men were prone to come my friend. His name WSN and AFR. Check on their WSN dad took me to face the mempunyal orphanage and a boarding school outside the city. WSN father sincerely offered me to study and live in pesantren at no cost. My brother asked to stay in an orphanage in order to more thoroughly educated and disciplined. "Because, in matters of intelligence and science, we are not under the other nations. However, because no discipline, so we are always left behind." WSN's father said wisely.
I am grateful. This is the lesson Nabl apparently saw, ordered his people to strengthen Silaturrahmi because of the friends often have more than you love yourself. When I got home, my mom agreed to my intentions without wasting time, my brother will soon take you to the orphanage. I myself have started packing up to go to boarding school. I saw my mother do not cry, but her eyes wet, moist. I knew he was very sad. This is what causes I could not sleep all night. Would my heart to leave her alone in Jakarta, with many difficulties and shortcomings? Or does he have to kupulangkan to the village to witness the sad spectacle of her husband wandered into the crowd?
NO. I do not want smth-quiet at boarding school while my mother-heat berterik hawking wares. So what can business do? That impasse, suddenly came back a helping hand. This time from my friend the children of the rich: Hendi, Aris, and Nouvrlzal. They deliberately visited to offer valuable assistance. I was invited to stay at home parent who holds a number of Nouvrlzal another lodger who have trouble paying contract. One of them is Mr. Tri, the teacher himself. According Nouvri, I can take my mother as well.
I asked for time to think. Of course, after I delivered terlma inestimable love for their welded keikh to help. And when things ni kukemukakan to Mother, kellhatanya He does not agree. He said gently, "My son. It may be more secure in your life stay at home. Similarly, Mother, do not bother to trade around with inadequate results. However, to enjoy their own earned it greater wealth than other people riding . Intention they are sincere. And they were rewarded with glory. But we have no sin to menampiknya politely. "
Kubulatkan So my resolve to get up again. My brother was not so I brought to the orphanage. Not because he thinks it pantl care not capable of guaranteeing livelihood and education. No. I just can not bear to let go of my mother's love is still desperately needed. Also because my mother seemed to be so loved, exceeds himself. It proper since she separated from my father due to illness of his soul, he also had to be divorced from the heart of his heart?
However, with what effort I can overcome this crisis? From WHO I CAN get a clue? To get the answer I was praying in a prayer for longer tahajud. When the residents were asleep, I raised my hands up, begging his karunla overflow. The next day I came to Kang Dir however now changed his attitude to me. All complaints kesahku tell him. His heart bled, he let me use a cart on his cigarette, on the condition that, within two weeks have been providing as much money as USD 100,000, to pay its debts. I nodded even though I counted the remaining money tlnggal USD 45,000.00 after the cut to complete the daganganku.
Indeed I doubt, can I get the less within two weeks? Bismillah. I never retreat. I'm sure, with the struggle and truly test the patience to accept the Lord, His blessing door someday be open. Proved correct guess. The friend came embellished deficiencies that still Rp 55.000. With their pocket money, my friends after my high school was that contribute Rp 10.000,00, USD 15,000.00, and the like so that the cost of what I needed was already in my pocket.
I can now calmly selling cigarettes and some baranq needs other everyday. And with the profits I could pay for my brother, to extend the contract home, and school finance in the last class of a private high school. My mother no longer need to sweat. I've been able to cover all household needs. In fact, to my uncle in the village also send some money each month for the benefit of my father who was still floating in his own world.
Just who always put about my feelings, until now Kang Dir not collect the money wagon, and always refuse when I leave the grounds to those who have not yet come receivables. So, the cart still not be mine. Layakkah I keep using it? Or save Kang Dir other purpose? Lighten the burden, perhaps? Or ...? Ah, who would that be able to answer these doubts raguanku?